Let go and let God
The Way I See It
by DON WEST
About 28 years ago, I disproved the old adage, “if I walked into church, the roof would fall down.” After a long hiatus from the church, I proved that the dog just wouldn’t hunt anymore. I went, though cautiously, sat in the back, just in case I needed to make a quick escape, but miraculously, the roof didn’t fall in and I have put many different churches in jeopardy since that time, but no catastrophes.
Now, I just walk in every week, begging for mercy and forgiveness, and I just say, “Here I am again.” I doubt that anyone is impressed, nor should they be, as I am just a sinner, much in need of mercy, and living the same life I always have. The difference is that when I do make the effort to attend Mass, there is always the chance I may see or hear something that will cause that seed planted many years ago to sprout, to make flower, to grow fruit.
Meanwhile, I just do what is comfortable, what is convenient, and I just keep on praying that God will find a way into my stubbornness to root out my laziness. I am a work in progress, but progress is slow. If God is paid by the hour, he has made a bunch of money on this job.
During those years of limited participation at church, I adopted an attitude that God and I had our own thing going. I had forgotten that I didn’t make the rules, that I hadn’t chosen Him, but He had chosen me. It was his team, not mine, and it will always be his team, with his rules, and He is the victor. Egomaniacal was a good term to describe me back then, and though God has taught me on numerous occasions that he can take my legs out from under me when I need it, He has also taught me that I can see more clearly when I am down on my knees.
Once in a while, He offers me the opportunity to see or hear a message that I need, and recently I heard a recap of a scene from the Bible when Jesus instructed Peter to push his boat off into deeper water and cast his nets. Vividly described in terms easy for us to understand, the speaker suggested that Peter was probably tired, having fished all night with very little luck, picked up and cleaned his nets, and was putting them away. He was probably anxious to get home, take a bath, eat, and get some rest, but God said, “push off into deeper water and cast your net”. The difference between Peter and where I was mentally 30 years ago, is that Peter said O.K. He did as he was told and reaped the bounty, not just a small return for his faith, but a bountiful harvest. It is as God has promised, “Cast your bread upon the waters and it will be returned to you tenfold”.
As I look back on my years of business ventures, it is easy to see now that I would never have survived or been successful had God not been there to knock me down when I needed it, and pick me up when I couldn’t do it alone. The hardest part, even today, is discerning when to push, and when to let him pull me, but then I realize, He knows when I need pulling.
As we approach the holy days of Easter, maybe it is a good time to let yourself be pulled, stop resisting, and enjoy the bounties that await.
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